I am still studying for my fifth (and hopefully final) year at Indiana Wesleyan University. I am still struggling to learn how to live life well, and most weeks I only hope to come away with some sense of survival. I am attempting to try my best at school, despite my frequent failures (small and large), in hopes of improving my overall skill at these beloved academics. I think I am too comfortable. If I am to succeed, I will be stretched by the work school requires of me. Maybe I have been taking life too easy?
I have lost quite a bit of confidence as pertains to my future in ministry. I suspect this has to do with my lack of present involvement in ministry. I seem to have lost a vision for God's call on my life. This I must recover, by God's grace.
I am also trying to open myself up to the fullness of grace the Lord has to offer us. Though I often fail, I desperately desire to experience and share God's immeasurable love. I want a deeper, joy-filled life, animated by the Holy Spirit, full of grace and good fruit. So I suppose I need a lesson in abiding in Christ. Perhaps I ought to focus on serving others, so as to take the attention off my own growth.
I also work about 15 hrs. per week at Steak n Shake.
That's it -- my life, for now.
Lord, have mercy.
